A day in the life of the person I could have been

I got to spend two awesome days with my brother this week while he was home, with him and many of his friends, partying at various apartments and enjoying myself more than I have in a long time.

I've made a couple recent decisions that I'm still trying to decide on as far as how good they are for my eventual well being. Its been one of those weeks where you see your life how it could be, might have been, has the potential to be.. it's a very eye opening type of experience.

I missed my brother. I did, however, see more of him that I would like to have *coughhackwheeze*, and I think I have overdosed on time spent with older brother and am perfectly alright with the fact that he is leaving Sunday morning.

Of course, right when he leaves I'm sure I'll just go back to missing him and disregard the fact that he spent most of this week doing things that make me worry for his eventual mental and physical health.

Such is the life of a Marine who does not enjoy bearing that title.

He has pretty awesome friends though. I know all of them, through school, the years, one of them I've known since I was a kid. So I never really had an awkward moment. It was just a bunch of friends hanging out.

All in all, I've had a pretty awesome week.

Another thing. I've realized why I have the friends I have. Female ones anyway.

Angel is my confidant for things that I know my other friends would just give me weird looks for and disregard. She accepts the things about me others would find strange or deterring, and tells me that the way I feel inside is okay, and normal, not bad and frowned upon.

Megan I can always trust, and I know that if I show up right in the middle of something and need just five minutes of her time, she will put everything down, listen and try to help see me through my problems. She and I 'connect' in many bizzare ways, and get along even better due to the fact that we have been through so much together, and are still alive, and best friends.

Alyse was the one I could gossip with. I could call her at one am, babble on about Sam and this and that, and 'Oh, he's so cute, and blah blah blah" and she would laugh and share and coo over all the adorable, idiotic feminine details.

My car's transmission is going out, by the way.. Thanks to Angel and Kendall looking at it, and listening to me verbalize the odd sounds and sensations that my little Toyota has been making, I think it may be able to be saved with some tinkering and TLC.

Seriously, that car is my life and I'll go mad if it dies. Only form of transportation and all...

I'm still being pressured to move out of my house. The relationship between my mom and I gets worse every day.. The last argument we had she said that I couldn't have more than one sleepover a week anymore because I have had four in row with Megan and "she just doesn't think that I am where I say I am". I have to have Megan call her and talk to her, and my mom reminds Megan every time to 'text her and let her know if I leave so that she can keep tabs on my whereabouts'.

I know I'm 18, and I know I live at home (their house, their rules, etc) but there has got to be a limit to how much she can control me and hold me down just because she thinks I'm always up to something.

Her fears are not unfounded, based on past experiences, but I'm just so tired of her calling me out left and right for stuff that I am really not doing! She thinks I'm sleeping around with one of Kendall's friends simply because she freaking hates said friend... Because I haven't been dating Sam for a year and a half!

I just wish I could find myself another job and go live in someone's basement.

If anyone feels like living with me, please, I am accepting potential roommates lol :)

As long as you pay rent on time and don't let me hear you doing the nasty through the wall, I'm totally cool with you lol.