I don't understand.

So Jorden came up to see me tonight, we haven't talked in really long time, and I missed it. Regularly I would stick around the apartment after Sam had fallen asleep, and Jorden and I would go off having random conversations about life and just discuss everything under the sun.
We talked for about two hours, and he was parked like in front of my neighbors house. Just a litte past one am, my mom texts me asking where I am.
Obviously I was in trouble.
Now, after having dealt with this situation more than once in my life (the whole 'get caught being out way late' deal), game plan was as usual: Walk upstairs, give brief explanation, go into room, let entire thing drop.
It's worked perfectly in the past.
But when my mother is around, she seems to just...explode over stuff like this. I mean, my dad gets angry too, but his anger is usually suitably justified, and I almost always deserve it.
So....she proceeds to all but yell at me what on earth was I doing outside.
I just told her I was talking to Jorden.
"YOU WERE IN A CAR!!!"
No shit, Sherlock, glad your observation skills are up to par.
"Yes mom, Jorden came up to talk to me."
"I THOUGHT YOU SAID HE DIDN'T HAVE A CAR!!!"
Ok, car-obsessed lady...
"It was Sam's car."
*blank stare*
"WHY WAS HE IN SAMS CAR?!?!"
"Well, quite obviously, Sam let him take it to come up and see me."
*furious stares/silence at my witty reparte of answers*
"WHY WERE YOU OUTSIDE AT THIS TIME OF NIGHT-*curfew lecture*- IN A CAR!!!"
"Mom, why are you freaking out over the fact that I was in a car? Honestly, I realize that you cannot, for the life of you, tell what a car is by looking at it, much less when it's at night, but if you hadn't noticed, Sam has a huge sticker across his back window that says "Noah's" on it, that should have, at some point, tipped you off."
"WHY DID YOU HAVE TO SNEAK OUT, COULDN'T YOU HAVE JUST CALLED HIM ON THE PHONE????"
"His cellphone is shut off."
*more blank stares and fury, considering I've totally shut her down again*
" I NEVER WANT YOU IN A CAR WITH JORDEN EVER AGAIN, YOU HEAR ME??? EVER!!!"
"Ok, why, Mom, what is your big issue with me being in a car with Jorden?"
*stalks away refusing to answer*
I am getting mad now. Okay, I was mad a while ago.
"Give me an answer!"
"BECAUSE YOU CAN STILL HAVE SEX IN A CAR TEN FEET AWAY FROM THE HOUSE, THAT'S WHY!!!!"

At this point, I would like to interject the base emotion that made me write all this down in the first place.
I hate my mother. On occasion we get along, we ever share experiences, memories and other things together, on a reasonably enjoyable level.
But at times like this...I just don't know what to say to her.
I understand she doesn't trust me.
I understand that, when caught in a situation like this, she will suspect the worst.
But here is what gets me.
Hearing her tell me that she thinks I was out having sex with Jorden, ten feet away from my house, is the most insulting thing she could possibly have come up with to say.

I have NEVER cheated on Sam. I WOULD NEVER cheat on Sam. I have stressed this to both adult figures on more than one occasion, and with varying degrees of forcefulness. After eight months of this, you'd think they'd get the message that I have determined to be totally loyal. I have been cheated on, I know how it feels, and besides, if no one has noticed recently, I happen to be madly, delusionaly in love with Sam anyway!

Her standing there saying that was interpreted thusly into my mind.
"I think your a slut, who, no matter the attachment to any given boy, will have sex with someone else without a second thought, in any given circumstance if it suits you."

See how this little chit chat we were having could make me angry?

My dad made us stop because I started swearing at her. It was indirect, I was more just using swear words in general. I think he yelled at us to separate once I screamed,
"What the hell kind of person do you think I am, huh?"
Yeah, that was it. Nothing horrid, but hey, they're Mormon.

I guess....even though I know they do not trust me at all... it would be really nice if my parents could, for once, not think I am sleeping with a guy just because I am talking to him after eleven pm at night.
That, for once, they would just say "Oh, ok. You know that is wrong, and technically breaking curfew. We are disappointed. Do not do that again, we have been over this before, goodnight."
INSTEAD of turning it into the Holy Inquisition, and condemning me to burn at the stake.
It's annoying. I hate it.

That's my rant for tonight.

I mean, other than those ten minutes, my life has been going pretty great. I have been entertained every single night for about a week now, seeing as things just keep happening as we get along into the wee hours of the morning, and I have stayed relatively happy. I almost want to say this situation burst my bubble, but whenever I think about the 3Oh!3 concert I am going to tomorrow, I cannot help but smile.

Jorden, thanks for coming to see me. I needed that.
Mom, your a bitch. Get over yourself. I can say it, I'm your kid.
Sam.. I miss you. And even though I know you'll never read this, I just want to tell you that I love you unconditionally, I really, truly, honestly do, and your the best thing that has ever happened to me. You mean the world to me. I don't go a day without thinking about you, I wake up every morning happy, because it means another day that I get to spend being yours.

I'm tired, and crying gives me headaches so I have to go dig some Tylenol out of somewhere before I go to sleep.
Much love and stuff.
-Nessa-